Looks like brew install imagemagick didn’t work for me. Found a bunch of people having issues after they moved the repo for it, but that wasn’t my problem. My problem was that it was refusing to create symlinks in /usr/local/etc. Seems /usr/local was owned by admin and set to 0775, and /usr/local/etc was also owned by admin and set to 0755. Temporarily chmodding these folders to 0777 fixed it, then I put everything back the way I found it.
Guess Homebrew ain’t always perfect.